Optimus Prime Declares: Megatron Must Be Destroyed
by LKW
Summary: G1. A reaction to Transformers US issue 25. Optimus Prime fans will need a sense of humor ... Now with explanation


Takara, Hasbro, and their authorized licencies own all characters in thisstory.

This story was originally written, in simple comic book form, about a year and a half ago (including punctuation which, although increasingly accepted in various print media, I had to spell out here). If you haven't read Transformers #25 (you're probably better off; I was so scarred I had to write this reaction some fifteen or sixteen years after it was published; but), and some other TF comics which have informed my writing, you may not get everything (particularly Prime's dialogue at the end); hopefully, there will still be something of interest or amusement.

UPDATE: I decided it would help to know the specific story which I am improving - er, parodying - in this and its sister piece ("Shockwave's Logical Conclusion"). In Marvel Comics' Transformers (US numbering) #25, Optimus Prime has just allowed himself to be blown up, because he cheated in a computer-simulated fight to the death with "Megatron". (The Marvel depiction of the character was so inaccurate, for almost the entire run of the series, that I won't even dignify their character by calling it Megatron. Certainly not in connection with TF # 25 ...) "Megatron", who seemed sane enough at the end of last issue, spends this issue becoming increasingly paranoid and agitated, until Shockwave manipulates him into thinking that Prime's essence has been saved on a floppy disk (which is exactly what happened, by the way (yes, Prime's brain is apparently that small ;) ), not that that occurs to the mighty intellect of Shockwave). "Megatron" responds by ... going on an insane rant, which I adapt at the end of this story, hopping on the Space Bridge, and blowing it up. Yeah. So, if the progression of Optimus Prime in this story doesn't seem to make any sense, it's because I'm adapting a story which doesn't make any damn sense. (Why bother? Because it amused me to turn this scenario, paired with my own way of getting there, on another character, rather than one which shared at least the name (if not even the correct head color ...) of Megatron. And it gave me the chance to poke some fun at a few other things, such as Marvel Comics' Ratchet's tendency to try to sacrifice himself to destroy Megatron over ... and over ... and over ...)

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Prowl walked through the main entrance into the Ark's command center. The Autobot base seemed oddly quiet this afternoon. A number of warriors appeared to be absent from the landlocked spaceship's corridors. Prowl was not aware of any scheduled mission; and, considering that he was the Autobot Military Strategist and Analyst, any operation of which he was unaware would be quite unusual indeed. The Transformer who would surely have the answers was up ahead, pacing across the main floor of the center. Optimus Prime, the Autobots' great, noble, powerful leader, was the one robot even less likely than Prowl to be unaware of what their forces were doing. Prowl was certain of this. The thought which never crossed the black and white robot's powerful data processor, however, was just how unhappy he would be with what the Autobot Commander would have to say.

There were a handful of other Autobots scattered around the center. Windcharger and Topspin were seated at a computer station, filling a report on … some Earthern racing game? -Sigh.- Blaster, at least, appeared to be attending to official duties: he was seated in communications, logically enough, apparently awaiting a message. As Prowl's full attention returned to the tall, red-with-blue-and-silver frame of his commander, he noted an unusual … agitation. Besides the pacing, the rest of Prime's movements, the way his optics darted back and forth …. If it weren't Optimus Prime, Prowl would have characterized the attitude of the robot in front of him as … nervousness.

The tone of the words emerging from behind Prime's mouthplate did nothing to dissuade this notion. "Why haven't they called back in yet?" Prime asked, most likely of Blaster, though his query seemed more aimed at the air around him. "Why? Why (question mark exclamation point)"

"Who, mighty Optimus?" Prowl asked, coming up beside his commander.

Optimus Prime continued to stare ahead, a look of some concern bending the metal around his optics. "The Dinobots. Brawn. Jetfire. Omega Supreme. Fortress Maximus. And Bumblebee."

One name, while that of a brave and resourceful Autobot, struck Prowl as being out of place on that list. "Bumblebee?" he asked, half to himself.

"They MUST succeed in their vital mission," Prime continued. "They MUST destroy Megatron for me!" His navy blue right fist slammed into his left palm.

"Megatron?" Prowl was officially confused now. If there was any mission which he should have at least known about – if not actually have been involved in the planning of - an attack against the evil, incredibly powerful leader of the Dectpticons was it. "You've sent many of our mightiest warriors … and Bumblebee … against Megatron?"

"YES, Prowl!" Prime exclaimed emphathically. " Megatron MUST be stopped! And at last he should be!" Prime turned to more fully face Prowl, enthusiasm for his plan overtaking anxiety. "I've even arranged for Shockwave and Starscream to attack today, as well!"

"What?" How had Prime gotten the cooperation of these two rebelliously ambitous Decepticons? And, moreover … why? "How?" was the only part of his query which Prowl felt comfortable voicing aloud.

Prime replied calmly, "I've promised them leadership of the Decepticons … Greenland … Three Mile Island … northern southern southeastern South Carolina … and Hot Rod."

Prowl's neutral net about exploded out of his head. "What (question mark exclamation)" he cried, with about as much incredulity as he'd ever used in his life. "Prime … what are you thinking (question mark exclamation) You CAN'T do all of that! And why didn't you go with them?"

Optimus Prime's utter shock at this last question apparently put Prowl's alarm to shame. "What (question mark exclamation) Are you INSANE, Prowl? Megatron WANTS to get me! THAT is why he must be destroyed!"

Not a huge fan of feelings to begin with, a terrible one began to overtake Prowl. As illogical as it was to talk to one's self, a worried "Oh boy …." escaped his metal lips.

"And he should have been," Prime continued, oblivious to Prowl's concern. "Why haven't they called yet (question mark question mark)"

"Prime!" Blaster called from the communications console. "Incoming!"

"At last!" Optimus Prime exclaimed. "Megatron has fallen!" He seemed to visibly relax, standing more erect, shedding the nervous ticks of agitation. With calmness apparently came a new thought. "… I should have gone with my brave soldiers … and traitorous Decepticons …."

"But …" - although Prime's demeanor had improved, Prowl was not assured of his leader – and friend's – mental health yet - "why are you so certain NOW that you should have gone?"

"Because," Prime replied, "not having destroyed him myself I wasn't sure I could have. But now, I recall that none can withstand the might of – "

A voice emanating from the communication console's speakers cut off the Autobot leader's remark. It was a confident, powerful … and very familiar voice.

"Greetings, Optimus Prime!" it said, with cheery amusement and pleasure.

"What?" asked Optimus Prime, in a voice suddenly gone quiet with disbelief – and perhaps other things ….

An image appeared in the communications monitor screen. An image being projected, Prowl recogized, from just outside the perimeter of the Autobot base. Standing beside a smouldering pile of Shockwave … was a very functional Megatron.

The Decepticon leader did have a few visible dings and dents. A burn spot here, a little chip of missing metal there. But he was clearly in far better shape than Shockwave. One of the purple Transformer's gray antennae dangled from the side of his head; the other was missing its tip. The rim across the top of Shockwave's face was broken, and smoke was rising from his form. Prowl couldn't see any other menber of the attack party on-screen. But clearly, Prime's mission had failed. Megatron was alive. And apparently amused, as a smile was spread across his face.

"It was a good effort," his voice continued over the communications channel, " … but not good enough to defeat Megatron!"

"No …." Again Prime spoke in the same voice. Prowl looked at his leader concernedly. Optimus' optics were wide, locked on the viewscreen.

"I'm coming for you, Prime!" Megatron said.

Optimus Prime's eyes were as round and wide as moons.

He backed away from the monitor, his famed laser rifle in hand. "He LIVES! Megatron lives (exclamation exclamation)" Prime exclaimed.

"Uh-oh …" Prowl murmured.

Prime's optics now appeared to ripple and swirl as he spoke. "But he won't get Optimus, no!" Prime continued. "Optimus is too clever! Yes … too clever!"

The Autobot Commander had backed into a darkened doorway in the back of the room. Holding his blaster aloft, he cried "Optimus will go where no one can ever find him!"

"In a closet?" Windcharger asked quietly of the other Autobots in the control room, now all too aware of their leader's state.

And now joined by Grimlock, the Dinobot Commander. The powerful warrior was clearly damaged from the failed attempt on Megatron. Though Grimlock was currently in his robot mode, his Tyrannosaur head was visible across his back. It appeared to Prowl as though its jaw was broken, and most of its teeth snapped off. Grimlock's deep voice rang out in the chaos of the control room.

"Me Grimlock … am extremely disappointed in the ill-advised strategy and slipshod tactics devised by our erratic – "

"Uh, Grimlock …" Prowl interjected.

Irregardless of the interruptions, Optimus Prime continued his mad tirade. "WHERE MEGATRON CAN NEVER FOLLOW –" He held his rifle high, pointing at something in the darkened room into which he'd retreated.

Suddenly Ratchet, the Autobots' chief medical officer, appeared. "NO, Optimus!" he exclaimed. "That's MY blow-myself-up-trying-to-destroy-Megatron device – "

Grimlock turned toward the command center exit. "Methinks – we should get –"

Prowl and Windcharger had already transformed into car mode, as Topspin sped other Autobots out the door. "Yeah," Prowl concurred.

Prime fired his rifle, steam shooting from his smokestacks.

**BOOM!**

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The dormant volcano which held the Ark exploded. Autobot forms fled in the distance.

Megatron stood across from the smoking rubble with a small group of Decepticons. Well, Starscream didn't stand so much as lie in a sparking heap, doubled over. And Buzzsaw perched, muttering "I'm BUZZSAW, and I can TALK, dammit …."

Shockwave, though, had managed to pull himself to his feet. The cord from his gun arm hanging uselessly, his left antenna about to fall off, the treasonous robot swayed from incredulity as much as damage. "Hypothesis:" he said, disbelief in his buzzing voice, "he … he blew up the Ark … and himself with it!"

"Congratulations, Megatron!" Soundwave intoned. "Or should I say Mighty Megatron, conquerer of the Autobots! You destroyed Optimus Prime!"

"Correction, Soundwave: **I** did not destroy Optimus Prime," Megatron smiled, " – the mere THOUGHT of me did! Whoity-whoity-ha-ha-ha-ha!"

The end!


End file.
